Right now, somewhere deep beneath the earth, Phil Selway is seated in a hooded chair stroking a black cat in chain-mail armor. “Excellent,” he hisses at the giant monitor on which he’s been conversing a pretty nervous but attentive Thom Yorke. “Everything is going according to plan. Soon, the transformation of Radiohead from ‘greatest, most mind-bending rock band on the face of the planet’ to ‘modest little IDM side-project’ will be complete!”
“Y… yes, your excellency,” Yorke peeps back in return. “I’ve just spoken with At Ease a moment ago, and the announcement about Radiohead releasing a 2-disc, 19-track remix album titled RADIOHEAD TKOL RMX on September 16 has just been posted, in accordance with your wishes. Th… they said that there was a bit of a snafu in Japan, though, and it’s going to pop up three weeks earlier out there.”
“What, three weeks!? Ah… um, I mean, no matter. Beautiful work, Thom. You shall be rewarded. Does the announcement make clear that this album is collecting the previously announced set of vinyl singles (two of which are already out and a few more of which are on the way) on the first CD, while including brand new remixes from Jamie xx, SBTRKT, Modeselektor, Objekt, Anstam, and Blawan on the second CD?”
“Yes, Mr. Selw—”
“That’s DOCTOR Selway, Thom!” Phil roars in return in perfect sync with a nearby thunderclap. “Otherwise known as The King of Limbs! And soon, when Radiohead is no more than a boring, outsourced remix project for recycling old tracks, its former legions will have NO CHOICE but to listen to my solo albums as their only source of original music from Radiohead’s members! Hahahahahahaha! Isn’t that right, my darling little Cat A?” He strokes the cat affectionately and mumbles something to her in Portuguese.
“B… but Mr. King of Limbs, sir, I… I mean- DOCTOR Selway,” Yorke interrupts, now visibly shaking. “What about all of Jonny Greenwood’s solo music?” Cat A leaps off of Selway’s lap and he rises out of his chair before the computer monitor and removes his chain-mail armor, revealing for the first time a grotesque and clearly homemade set of bionic limbs.
“Oh,” Selway sighs. “I’ll deal with Greenwood.”
RADIOHEAD TKOL RMX trklst:
Disc 1:
01. Caribou, “Little By Little Rmx”
02. Jacques Greene, “Lotus Flower Rmx”
03. Nathan Fake, “Morning Mr Magpie Rmx”
04. Harmonic 313, “Bloom Rmx”
05. Mark Pritchard, “Bloom Rmx”
06. Lone, “Feral Rmx”
07. Pearson Sound, “Morning Mr Magpie Scavenger Rmx”
08. Four Tet, “Separator Rmx”
Disc 2:
01. Thriller, “Give Up the Ghost Houseghost Rmx”
02. Illum Sphere, “Codex Rmx”
03. Shed, “Little By Little Rmx”
04. Brokenchord, “Give Up the Ghost Rmx”
05. Altrice, “TKOL Rmx”
06. Blawan, “Bloom Rmx”
07. Modeselektor, “Good Evening Mrs Magpie Rmx”
08. Objekt, “Bloom Rmx”
09. Jamie xx, “Bloom Rework”
10. Anstam, “Separator Rmx”
11. SBTRKT, “Lotus Flower Rmx”
• Radiohead: http://www.radiohead.com
• The King of Limbs Store: http://www.thekingoflimbs.com