PURPOSE:
The purpose of this experiment is to determine whether a connection can be formed between the child-like songwriting of Moldy Peach Kimya Dawson, who will be touring the U.S. starting next week, and the inherent childhood memories of TMT readers of their own junior high science fairs, and also to observe and record the extent to which the aforementioned connection does or does not affect my general popularity as a music newswriter.
HYPOTHESIS:
Since Ms. Dawson has such luck drawing fans with minimalistic, naiveté-affected, "first-draft" technique, it follows that I should receive similar adulation and/or credibility for delivering the following tour news of said artist with similar, heart-on-sleeve gusto.
EXPERIMENT:
Hey, hey, heyyy! Do U lyk when i kIsS you like BUNNYS??? U should C Kimya Dawson (yah, from that mOviE! <3 ) on tour tour tour, aRound and aRound and AroUnD like MERRY-GO-Rounds after sKool where U gAvE me my 1st hand-hold; We wErE pirates 2gthr then, 2 kool 4 the othR kids and rIdIng biKes, eaTing cHocolate, and fUck GeOrge Bush and alll prezidents ever . . . I laUgH whenU laff. we'Re conn-eccted by hi wIrEs... <3 <3 <3
RESULTS:
* Angelo Spencer
** Angelo Spencer & L'Orchidee D'Hawai
CONCLUSION:
You tell me, Rolling Stone. Am I hired???