Just kidding about laughing. I ain't laughing. This ain't no laughing matter.
This past Saturday, it was announced that Norway's long-standing Quart Festival was canceled due to "ticket sales being weaker than expected and budgetary concerns." And that's even with a pretty hefty lineup (Death Cab for Cutie, Gnarls Barkley, Battles, Liars, Spank Rock, Holy Fuck, Kool Keith, etc.)! Maybe people were sick of Bibles being burned on stage? Or pigheads being thrown in the audience? Or people having sex on stage? (These all really happened, FYI.)
And now, word has just come in that the debut of South East England's Redfest has been canceled too. "Due to the very disappointing tickets sales we have had no choice but to call the festival off," according to a post on the official website. Admittedly, the lineup wasn't quite as stellar -- Crystal Castles, Does It Offend You, Yeah?, Los Campesinos!, Patrick Wolf -- but this still breaks my heart. Who the hell knows what kind of sexual or violent or religious scandal might've happened there. Maybe Patrick Wolf having sex with the lead singer of Does It Offend You, Yeah?, while barfing in the mouth of Los Campesinos' most religious member? IN YOUR DREAMS PERVERT! (Mine too.)