Tiny Mix Tapes

YouTube Underground Railroad Launched

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YouTube. It's home to skateboarding videos, people falling down, music prodigies, and recently major corporate sponsorship. YouTube is more than that though. It's a community, a place to hang your hat. YouTube is a place to go, a destination, an end result of boredom. But my problem with it is that it's just a catch-all for videos. In this day of target audiences and individualism, YouTube is all about everything, from video blogs to soft-core porn.

So I propose spin-offs to appease some of my interests.

Pool CueTube: It's a fact that everyone enjoys billiards, and even more people enjoy instructional videos on how to assemble, hold, and use a pool cue, all of which I produce.

MewTube: Pokemon are an international phenomenon, and Mewtwo is the poor man's Pikachu. Mewtwo is older, uglier, and a d-bag, but what can I say, I gotta catch 'em all.

Seattle SlewTube: I love this 1977 Triple Crown winner. So Slew me!

Big League ChewTube: I have a LOT of videos of me chewing gum.

There you have it: my personalized versions that we all can relate to. It seems YouTube has gotten a big head with all their sponsors and advertisers, so they shot me down. But they liked my idea of individualism, so they created a contest that only deals with music.

According to Digital Trends, the video site is teaming up with Cingular Wireless to make the YouTube Underground. It's a contest — a talent search, if you will — for unsigned bands and musicians. These people will create "original videos from October 2 to October 18, 2006. The YouTube user community will vote to select the finalist, and Chop Shop Music Supervision founder Alexandra Patsavas will select the winners for best song, best music video, best live performance, and best creative work." The four winners will get trips to New York City for a spot on Good Morning America and some guitars from Guitar Center. (Personal note: I expect the contest to fail because the name doesn't rhyme.)

The winners get to use the Gibson Guitar tour bus, which features the Les Paul Combustion Engine. Cool! They also get a "photo shoot for a top music publication." Huh? Who knows! Anyway, that's cool that people will vote on faux musicians and the media will create a faux buzz. Cool! If only they'd take a look at my suggestions, YouTube might be a success.