I’ve been getting a lot of tweets and emails as to where I have been. To make a sad story long, it started two weeks ago when my wife, Mysterio, slipped a divorce ring into my Quesalupa. I was left out on the street with a suitcase full of broken dodos. With nowhere to go, I decided to live in the TMT offices. I hid in the air ducts at night, and I lived off the overstock of Mr P’s Strawberry SlimFast [editor’s note: so that was you!!]. Unfortunately, during this dark time in my life, my TMT coworkers thought I went missing, and they gave as many fucks as C Monster’s favorite type of Coke.
Zero.
The only thing that got me through the night was reading press releases hot off Mr P’s private inkjet [editor’s note: thanks for asking first…]. I’d sneak a couple stacks and read them during the night. One that brought tears of salty liquid to my eyes was info on the new Nite Jewel album, Liquid Cool, out June 10 on Gloriette Records. I listened to the lead single, “Boo Hoo,” on Mr P’s iMac [editor’s note: thanks for the Lisa Frank wallpaper!], and the straightforward dance-pop tune had me crying. Is Mysterio thinking about me at night, and is there someone else sleeping with her in my bed?
Liquid Cool tracklist:
01. Nothing but Scenery
02. Was That a Sign
03. You Now
04. Kiss the Screen
05. Over the Weekend
06. Boo Hoo
07. I Mean It
08. Running Out Of Time
09. All My Life