We usually avoid albums like Rock ‘N’ Roll Rorschach but the creepy cover art intimidated me even though I knew what I was getting into. This isn’t dark arts hoodoo voodoo, just straight-laced rock and roll. Which is to say sexy, dirty, and dingy. The hex threatened is not a curse but a blessing of garage noir. I want to rub R&RR all over myself and run free from the shackles of corporate rock (does that even exist anymore? let’s pretend that it does and it looms heavy and large and conglomerates with billboards will hunt me down for refusing their enchantments).
Is that enough nostalgic rebellion to fulfill a typical Lantern review? Good, because it’s crap. What you need to know is this is VU type shit, not in approach but as motivation for you to get off your indented, lumpy couch and to play rock and roll yourself. Emily and Zachary are giving you the knock of opportunity, so don’t waste it on your sorry ass. Though, pass me that roach before you go. I’m gonna sit here and write about your new band, and if you don’t give Lantern and R&RR the praise and credit it deserves for inspiring your Lou Reed cool, then the band WILL come calling in black robes and Satanic verses to take back what is rightfully theirs.
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