This past February saw the maiden voyage of the Bruise Cruise, the weekend-long festival on a boat that sails from Miami to the Bahamas and back. There’s typical cruise fare: the food, the pools, the drinks. But then there’s that extra something you just can’t get on a Royal Caribbean cruise with your parents: good, old-fashioned rock ‘n’ roll. There was none of that hokey disco shit that gets repeated week after week throughout the cruise season, no Beatlemania bands or Elvis impersonators. Last year, the boat was packed with solid acts like Thee Oh Sees, The Black Lips, Vivian Girls, and Ty Segall (who, yes, did facilitate a marriage proposal onboard). Apparently, the festival was a blast and the voyage was deemed successful enough to announce a second cruise in 2012, sailing February 10-13!
Indeed, cheesy family-friendly (lame) fun is gone from this boat; Neil Hamburger’s got the comedy sector under control for the Bruise Cruise’s second go, and Miss Pussycat promises a “puppetry breakfast hour” the likes of which kids have never seen on Sesame Street. Thee Oh Sees and Quintron are on the bill again, along with King Khan & The Shrines, The Soft Pack, The Dirtbombs, and DJ Jonathan Toubin. Like I said, it’s still a cruise ship, so there’s a casino, open-bar hours, lectures, and the kind of expensive pampering (/drinking) that you see in commercials — as if partying with King Khan weren’t enough. Only 500 guests are admitted, so if you like the Bahamas and “rock the boat” puns, buy a ticket here.
• Bruise Cruise Festival: http://www.bruisecruisefestival.com
