My birthday was this week, and because of that, I decided to throw out all the rules of journalism for the remainder of this news story. Silly? Yes. But it's my birthday week, and I can do what I want, damnit! So, here is a story about a band called Grand Archives all in one sentence and with limited punctuation:
Grand Archives are from Seattle and feature Mat Brooke, a former guitarist from Band of Horses -- they are on tour this summer and you should go see them play live because their debut self-titled album just came out on Sub Pop and it’s really awesome and has cool songs like “A Crime Window” which is fast and “Sleepdriving” which is not so fast and I’m sure they would be a fun live band although I have not seen them live I am contemplating going to their show at the Empty Bottle in June.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have birthday cake to finish: