Okay nerds, you win: The music of the Beatles will arrive as a painfully nostalgic, interactive video game for the first time on September 9, 2009, when The Beatles: Rock Band hits stores all over North America, Europe, Australia, and New Zealand. The game, which will be available for Xbox, PlayStation 3, and Wii, “takes players on a journey through the legacy and evolution of the band’s legendary career.” Or, at least, it does according to the hippy-dippy press release distractedly issued by the title’s cash-high creators, Apple Corps, Harmonix, and MTV Games. Somewhat oddly, no playlist has been announced, nor has any word about specific venues and avatars (whatever those are, right?). There will, however be a limited number of instruments issued that are modeled after guitars, basses, and drums used by John Lennon, Paul McCartney, George Harrison, and... uh, who was that fourth guy? Regular Rock Band peripherals will be compatible, too. Once again, to that I say: whatever those are.
But wait, there’s more! Three separate offerings will be released on the dawn of this new British Invasion: the straight-up software for The Beatles: Rock Band; assuredly cheesed-out standalone guitars; and a limited-edition premium bundle that will presumably include the game and, presumably, some array of instruments and garish memorabilia. Additionally, if you are the kind of lonely, ’60s-culture-adopting, kinda-chubby-because-you-haven’t-quite-blossomed-yet-but-you-will-and-once-you-do-you-won’t-care-about-this-hippie-stuff-anymore-because-you-won’t-need-that-kind-of-instant-cool-crutch type of high school kid who is into pre-ordering now, the game’s makers claim that there’s some mysterious exclusive content reserved for those who reserve the game in advance through major retailers over the next few months. The game’s official Website is active and, unlike the real Beatles organization, promises updates.
And speaking of those darned Beatles, McCartney, Starr, Yoko Ono and Olivia Harrison are all backing the game, which is being overseen by Love co-producer Giles “Under-achiever and Proud of it” Martin.
Rumors that Beatles music would finally be transformed into its ultimate incarnation of digitized nostalgic-kitsch first fired up in June 2008, after insiders speculated that the appearance of the Fab Four’s music in American Idol, the [worst] film [in recent history besides Lady In the Water] Across the Universe, and the Cirque du Soleil Love production indicated Apple Corps might be willing to loosen their famously tight grip on the band’s catalog. In October 2008, the game’s makers made it official, announcing, “This game will take you on a journey from the Beatles first album Please Please Me until the last album at Abbey Road.” Well, hot damn. The only difference? The Beatles really knew how to play those guitars. But no, it’s cool. This is cool. You’re gonna be famous some day if you buy this thing. Really.
