Last night, like I always do after Fraiser, I called my dear mother out in the suburbs to catch up a bit:
Me: Hey mom. It’s me. Just checking in.
Mom: Oh... hi, Dan. What time is it?
Me: It’s just after 10. Sorry to be calling kinda late. But... you know... Fraiser...
Mom: Oh, Frasier, huh?
Me: Yeah...? So? What’s wrong with--
Mom: Daniel, please! Why don’t go spend your evenings doing something constructive instead of watching that damn TV for 8 hours every damn day! When are you gonna get a job? When are you going to go back to school? When are you going to start going to church again? When are you gonna ask that girlfriend of yours to--
Me: Mom! Alright! I get it; look, just please don’t do this now. I told you; I’m going to be a professional musician some day.
Mom: Professional musician!?!? Ha! Watching TV sure isn’t gonna get you there! You wanna know how hard a real musician works? Just look at Jonny Greenwood, for God’s sake!
Me: Jonny Greenwood? From Radiohead? Why? What’s he doing that’s so spectacular?
Mom: Oh, only having the West Coast Premiere of his string orchestra piece “Popcorn Superhet Receiver” at the Herbst Theatre in San Francisco on August 21st!
Me: Wow. Really? I mean, isn’t he touring with Radiohead and stuff this summer, though??
Mom: That’s the point, Dan! While juggling that highly successful career, he has also managed become involved in the world of composition. I mean, Radiohead are playing at the Outside Lands Music and Arts Festival in San Francisco the very next evening! Talk about busy! In fact, the BBC Concert Orchestra premiered that "Popcorn" piece of his back in 2005! The BBC! Then, the Wordless Music concert series brought it stateside, where it debuted in New York City last January. Oh, and then the Alabama Symphony played it in April! Your Cousin Andrew lives there, remember?
Me: Yeah, yeah, mom. I know.
Mom: Oh, well then, Mister! Did you also know that Benjamin Shwartz, the resident conductor of the San Francisco Symphony, will be conducting that Magik*Magik Orchestra that night?! And that you can buy tickets starting next week at cityboxoffice.com? And, and that other works will include music by Arvo Pärt, Fred Frith, Mason Bates, and John Adams?!?
Me: Oh, so it’s all kinda minimalist stuff, huh mom?
Mom: Oh, don’t be such a smartass! No one likes a smartass! Now, why don’t YOU start doing productive things like that, huh? You never get anything done, even at that snarky internet music magazine that you supposedly “work” for!
Me: Hey! I do work there! I just... haven’t written anything... lately... hey wait a minute!
Mom: Oh, what is it, now??
Me: Nothing! Got an idea for a story! It’ll be cute! I’ll have to call you tomorrow! Love you, mom...
08.21.08 - San Francisco, CA - Herbst Theatre:
Arvo Pärt - Cantus in Memoriam Benjamin Britten
John Adams - Shaker Loops
Mason Bates - Icarian Rhapsody
Fred Frith - Save As (Joan Jeanrenaud, Cello)
Jonny Greenwood - Popcorn Superhet Receiver
