P,
It's been wonderful. However, after reading that Steve Hewitt, the
drummer of Placebo, has decided to call it quits, I've decided it's
for the best that you pack your shit and leave before nightfall. Shh,
quiet, don't try making any connections; I know you may not understand,
but love is a complicated thing. Don't bother making dinner either; S. Kobak is taking me out this evening.
Honey, as you may or may not know, Placebo changed my life in middle
school, but now that I'm in college, I realize that any self-respecting
band that goes on tour with Linkin Park and My Chemical Romance
deserve to have a drummer quit. Besides, I caught you listening to that
Soulja Boy song in the shower the other night, and it made me realize
that any man who could sing "Superman those hoes" and still somehow be
a legitimately good human was impossible. So we're done.
I'm sorry, baby.
Love,
Scout
P.S. Placebo's drummer position will be replaced quickly, but your position
in my life will take a while to replace. In fact if you still wanna do
the friends with benefits thing, I'm in.
